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Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Overcoming Fear

Posting #10 


These next two postings are the talks Mike and I gave in church on Sunday; I thought they were good reminders for all of us



There are scriptural stories we read that tell of hero’s or heroines that seem almost supernatural:

Moses departing the red sea, Noah living in the belly of a whale, 2,000 stripling warriors facing one of the most violent battles in the Book of Mormon each defying death; Daniel making friends amongst lions; Shadrach, Meeshac, and Abendego escaping, untouched, the fiery flames that fought to consume them, etc. 

These hero’s although great in manifesting the power of God, can sometimes make us feel inadequate to mimic. But there is one narrative in the Bible that we as the “everyday” person can exemplify in our own lives, and that is the story of Esther.

There are many characters in the narrative that we can learn from: Haman and the downfall of his power because of pride and jealousy; Vashti standing up for principles she believed in; King Ahasureus– the problems he created by being so easily influenced by the people around him and of course his pride, greed, and rash way of living; and then there is of course Mordecai, a man of love—raising his niece whose parents died at an early age— a man of obedience and courage in going against, perhaps the “popular thing” of the day, instead doing what he knew had to be done in order to help save his people.

I could spend hours highlighting all the lessons we can learn from these characters but I only have 20 minutes today so I figured I would focus on, probably the character many focus when reading this book in the OT, and that is Esther.  Just so the men in the room don’t immediately check out thinking her influence is only applicable to women something I will highlight about her story today is of equal importance to men.

Esther

When re-reading the story of Esther, I asked myself, “What is it about Esther, in particular, that we gravitate towards?”  She didn’t jump at the opportunity to be the new queen, nor did she immediately have the courage to do what only she could do in order to save her people—petition the king. In fact when called upon to save her people the story makes it very clear that she hesitated, fearing if she did it would most likely cost her, her life.

Responding to Mordecai who petitioned her to save her people she said:

11 All the king’s servants, and the people of the king’s provinces, do know, that whosoever, whether man or woman, shall come unto the king into the inner court, who is not called, there is one law of his to put him to death, except such to whom the king shall hold out the golden sceptre, that he may live: but I have not been called to come in unto the king these thirty days.
Reading her response, could we still classify her as a heroine?  Arguably yes, the reason being: she was real, she wasn’t without flaw, just like you and I, yet she triumphed over it.  She is to us a relatable heroine.

We know, through her example, that we don’t need to be paralyzed by our own fears; that it is possible to overcome them so we too can fulfill our missions, or as Mordecai reminded her, “ who knoweth whether thou art come to the kingdom for such a time as this?”

I want to come back to Esther ‘s example in a moment, and focus right now on fears we face in our day because we know that ““Fear is prevalent throughout the earth. It stifles initiative, saps strength, and reduces efficiency. It weakens faith, brings doubts, and begets mistrust. Indeed, it tends to impede the very business of being. How negative, frustrating, and futile is fear.”

Feeling it’s stifling affect in our lives in particular, my husband and I have talked extensively about why we fear what we do.  In preparation for this talk, I asked him how he’s mastered some of his own fears and he gave me a great answer, which aligned perfectly with a talk I will refer to in a moment. He said, the only way to conquer a fear is to proactively face it over and over until you no longer fear it; remembering that fear is baseless. 

This “baseless” fear is something Elder Derek A. Cuthbert, then a member of the quorum of the 70, wrote about in an article entitled "The Futility of Fear”, which was published in the New Era, Nov. 1985. 

Obviously each of us fear different things but there are categories that Elder Cuthbert highlights that are applicable to all of our baseless fears. 

1)  Fear of Man: There are those who fear physical domination by others; however, the Psalmist gave good counsel that we should “not fear what flesh can do unto [us]” (Ps. 56:4).

The Lord, through Moses, declared with firmness to the Israelites: “When thou goest out to battle against thine enemies, seest horses, and chariots, and a people more than thou, be not afraid of them: for the Lord thy God is with thee, which brought thee up out of the land of Egypt” (Deut. 20:1).

Elder Cuthbert says that this fear of man can be resolved also by returning good for evil.  By smothering others with kindness and love, barriers are broken down and fear loses its power in our dealings with men.

2)  Fear of Criticism. Much more prevalent than physical fear is the fear of criticism, rejection, and verbal opposition. Again, the scriptures are replete with counsel and admonition.

Saul was rejected from being king because, as he confessed to Samuel, “I feared the people, and obeyed their voice” (1 Sam. 15:24). Elder Cuthbert asks us: “Will you transgress the commandments of the Lord because you fear what others will say if you don’t follow them in the ways of the world?”

It is hard trying to live in the world, yet remain free of its influence in our lives.  But we need to keep an eternal perspective, remembering why we are here at this time, and whose opinion really matters: our Heavenly Fathers. 

Elder Cuthbert also highlights the fear of “not open[ing our] mouths, [to share the gospel] … because of the fear of man” (D&C 60:2).
To this he counsels: When we have something to tell others, which will benefit them, protect them, or enlighten them, we should not hold back. There are so many people who are confused and discouraged and who want a better way of life. How grateful they are when someone takes the time to share their happiness and purpose in life.

He goes on to give another interesting perspective on the benefits of criticism by telling an Elder who called him one day worried about a man who was trying to stop them from knocking on doors, “Good,” I said. “You will have more uccess there, for the adversary is getting worried.”

There is never any need to fear opposition, criticism, or persecution, for we know what the outcome will be. The Lord’s work goes forward even more strongly, for “the works, and the designs, and the purposes of God cannot be frustrated, neither can they come to naught. . . “(D&C 3:1, 3).
 Fear of Events. There are some who fear events, such as examinations and tests, interviews, and journeys.
**These he says we sort of have to face; they come with life. But if we keep a positive attitude, remembering when we fear these events, to “look unto God in every thought, [to] doubt not, [to] fear not,” knowing He has the ultimate power to comfort us and to make all things well in our lives. (D&C 6:36).  
4)  Fear of Death. This particular fear arises from misunderstanding the purpose of life, and lack of knowledge of the plan of our Eternal Father. It is vital to come to an understanding that death is not the end but a new beginning, a necessary stage in our eternal progression. We don’t need to fear death if we are righteous, because we know that  “death is swallowed up in victory through our Lord Jesus Christ” (1 Cor. 15:54, 57).
5)  Fear of the unknown. I think this is a big one for many of us; we tend to fear what we don’t know.  Elder Cuthbert mentions that we can overcome these fears, which can include fear of the dark, fear of change, fear of the future, etc., by making our faith stronger than our fear, and by supplicating the help of others who can remind us that our fears are baseless (i.e. comforting a child who is afraid of the dark).

I have realized that there is no point in letting fear control my future because I don’t know the actual outcome of my future, and I kind of rejoice in that.  Why consume my present state of mind with fearing things I may or may never have to face? 

6)  Fear of Responsibility. There are all sorts of responsibilities we shy away from because we don’t want to be responsible for the outcome. Elder Cuthbert shared one example in his own life:

Literally within days of baptism, I was called to head the youth program in the Nottingham Branch. This was completely new to me, and I felt inadequate, but I knew the Lord had need of me. There were less than 7,000 members in the whole of the British Isles where there are now 40 stakes. We all had to be “anxiously engaged” in the work of saving souls, building the kingdom, and establishing Zion. So it is with all of us. It is futile to fear responsibility when we have been called to serve “by prophecy, and by the laying on of hands by those who are in authority” (A of F 1:5).

We have to trust that whatever responsibility we are given the Lord knows we have the capacity to do it.

7)  Fear of Loneliness. This type of fear often results in compromise of principles and giving in to the demands of others for fear of being lonely or the odd one out. In latter-day revelation, the Lord has given comfort and assurance to those in this situation by saying:
“Fear not, little flock; do good; let earth and hell combine against you, for if ye are built upon my rock, they cannot prevail” (D&C 6:34).
Fear of loneliness includes fear of not having anyone to talk to or being without help in time of need. These fears can be conquered by reaching out and giving service to others, becoming outward looking instead of inward looking, as Mordecai taught Esther “think not of thyself”.

Another example given by Elder Cuthbert: a few weeks ago, a brother complained to me, “When I was away on business recently in another part of the country, I went to church and no one spoke to me. I felt very lonely, especially since I was so far from home.” I paused and then asked him, “How many people did YOU speak to?” At first he was a little annoyed, feeling I had not been sympathetic, but then he smiled and said: “You’re right. I did hold back instead of reaching out.” In order to have a friend we must be a friend.

8)  Fear of the Past. This fear haunts those who have transgressed and not yet gained forgiveness and remission. It holds them back, but this should be but a temporary phase. As President Kimball has counseled: “To cure spiritual diseases which throttle us and plague our lives, the Lord has given us a sure cure—repentance”(The Miracle of Forgiveness, Salt Lake City: Bookcraft, 1969, p. x).
Once we confess, we need have no more fear about being found out. . . . we can look forward to, and indeed claim fulfillment of, the promise of the Lord that he will not only forgive but remember our sins no more.

Fear of the past has fled, and [we can start] out anew, knowing that “Today is the first day of the rest of [our] life.”

9)  Fear of Failure. There are those who will not even attempt to do something because they lack the self-assurance that they can accomplish it. I was raised with the old adage ringing in my ears: “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.“ There is no disgrace in failure, and in any case, we have never failed until we give up.

President N. Eldon Tanner remarked on one occasion, “One of the evils of the world today is not failure but low aim.” Just as we should not fear to fail, neither should we fear to aim high. There was no question of failure in the mind of Joseph the Prophet when, in the dark days of 1842, he penned the words: “Brethren, shall we not go on in so great a cause? Go forward and not backward. Courage, brethren; and on, on to the victory!” (D&C 128:22).

10)Although Elder Cuthbert began his talk with this category of fear, I decided to end with it because it’s the beautiful oxymoron that stifles all other fears and that is the importance of fearing God.

He says: “Among all of the possible fears, this is the only one that is valid. However, it is not fear in the normal sense of lack of courage, but rather love, respect, and reverence. Indeed, fear of God in this sense can dispel all other fears.”
Derek A. Cuthbert, "The Futility of Fear", New Era, Nov. 1985, 44

Isn't it interesting that in order to overcome all other fears we must cultivate one fear: fear of God?

Returning now to Esther, who I could have highlighted in every example Elder Cuthbert gave; however, I wanted to save her for this category because she exemplified this so well. She overcame her fear by knowing that God had more power to deliver her than anyone else, and she manifested this knowledge through one of many ways: fasting.

Said Esther to her Uncle Mordecai:

16 Go, gather together all the Jews that are present in Shushan, and fast ye for me, and neither eat nor drink three days, night or day: I also and my maidens will fast likewise; and so will I go in unto the king, which is not according to the law: and if I perish, I perish.
Having a testimony of the power of fasting Esther’s fear was overpowered by her faith manifested in her own words: “if I perish, I perish.” She literally applied the scripture, “don’t fear what can man do, for with God all things are possible;” and so the story ends with the Lord making it possible for her to actually save her people.

Conclusion

President Monson speaking to the sisters in General Conference 2009 said:

“You will probably not be called upon to put your life on the line, as did Esther, for that which you believe. You will, however, most likely find yourself in situations where great courage will be required as you stand firm for truth and righteousness.
Again, although there have always been challenges in the world, many of those which you face are unique to this time. You are some of our Heavenly Father’s strongest children, and He has saved you to come to the earth “for such a time as this.” With His help, you will have the courage to face whatever comes. Though the world may at times appear dark, you have the light of the gospel, which will be as a beacon to guide your way.” (May You Have Courage).

Esther was what we would call just an ordinary woman who cultivated a few extraordinary powers early in life so that when she was called upon to do the hardest thing she’d have to do, face one of her fears, she was prepared to do so.

We may not know what the outcome of facing our fears will be, but we must forge ahead.  We need not let our fears control us.  We must remember that “God hath not given us the spirit of afear; but of bpower, and of clove, and of a sound mind (2 Tim 1:7) We must exercise our faith in the Savior, and call upon his help through fasting, being obedient, increasing our love and reverence towards him, knowing that He can and will strengthen us as he did Esther, and many others, in our resolve to overcome our fears. 
                                







1 comments:

Dre + Drew - Pacific Northwest Living - DuPont, WA said...

Thanks for posting this a powerful talk and one I needed!!!

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