Be Here Now

“Be here now”. Stop, slow down, live in the moment, breathe, be here now.  This advice resonates with my mothering soul but my reality— the seemingly never ending, some times overwhelming, and yes often redundant tasks of keeping up with the speed needed to take care of four little running, messy, and falling feet— keeps me from “being here now.” It seems as though time and tasks are never on my side; my attention is never equally engaging enough or equally split enough between two boys. 

Glancing through old videos and pictures, feeling the surges of guilt course through my veins as I think back on all of the quiet, connected, in the moment moments I had with my first born, makes me realize there is nothing I long for more than to have my boys remember their mother as engaging, educating, energetic, and enlightening; than to have those moments with both of my boys—individually and collectively.

And so when that moment came for me to “fill that empty bucket,” I FILLED IT. 

I was fortunate to have that moment given to me when my husband had to attend a wedding out of state and decided to take our youngest son with him.  Although I missed my little towhead, blue eyed boy dearly, I was giddy thinking about these 4 days that would give back to me those quiet, connecting, in the moment moments with my first born.

The past four days have been life changing for both my little man and me. It was a gift to be able to have time slow down and be able to realize, all over again, just how incredible this little human being really is; to be able to enjoy him for everything that makes him unique and beautiful to me—to be reminded of all of the talents, awareness’s, strengths, and gifts he brings into my life.  

I think he had the best four days of his life; I have never seen him so happy.  I have never heard him say so many times “you’re the best mom in the world!” “I love having fun with you mom”; “this is the best day ever!” I have never received so many spontaneous, genuine hugs and kisses. And I have never felt so stress free and so completely recharged as a mother.

I made sure to document every thing we did so he and I could one day look back and remember that we had those in the moments moments, to remember there were times of connectedness, times of nothing but FUN, times of engagement, times of laughter, times of undivided attention and love.  Coming out of these four days I realize just how much I want to be proactive in making this a tradition—for my husband and I to have alone time with each of our kids; to connect with them, to let them know we love them, appreciate them, and SEE them as individuals. 

The second epiphany I had (forgetting what it was like to only have one child) is that although there are less spots on my floor, less handprints on my wall, less poop on my hands, less laundry to do, less crying and whining, less mouths to feed, less dishes to scrub . . . there is also more emptiness, more laughter missing, more learning and experiences to be had, and more love waiting to be given.  And so although this alone time with my big boy was the highlight of my month, I look forward to loving on my little munchkin and being a mother to four little running, messy, falling feet.  I look forward to proactively trying to take the moments for what they are (small, great, few and far between) and know that  “being here now” is met in those ordinary mother/son moments of engagement, education, energy, and enlightenment.

The Wonder and Blessing of Mothers

I wrote this tribute to my mother for her birthday, which just so happened to land a few weeks prior to Mother's Day, but every sentiment I felt when writing these words can easily be duplicated in honoring her on Mother's Day: 

Dearest Mother, 

I could write an entire blogpost about all the wonderful things I love about you, ways in which I am grateful for you, and the plethora of ways you are an example to me.  I am so grateful that I came into your world 34 years ago and that I had the privilege of being raised by such a beautiful woman! I feel like every GOOD thing I am today is because of you.  You taught me how to be fiercely loyal to any cause that I pursue; you taught me how to be proactive in my  life—to go after my dreams, to never settle for less, to push myself to always exceed my own expectations. You instilled within me a love of learning and a love of words. You nourished my creative and independent spirit by being the epitome of creativity, artistic ability, and independency. 

A few thoughts about this trait of being independent: I can't tell you how grateful I am that through your example you taught me how to survive (either through a hardship—physical or emotional— or a moment of defeat and/or exhaustion), you taught me how to be a leader not a follower, you taught me how to be able to be happy with myself and not have to rely on others for happiness, you taught me how to see a task and be able to execute it.  Thank you for never clipping my independent "wings"; I can't you how many times they have saved me, how many times when I have faced a very difficult situation in my life—causing me to doubt the very core of who I am—of being able to muster up enough agility to look behind me and see those wings, reminding me not only that I was born to fly but that I have the gumption and capability (because of my mothers example) to defeat the odds, to soar above the hardships and complexities of life.  Thank you for not only seeing who I was as a child, but nourishing and loving that person instead of trying to mold or change me into something you thought was an even better version of myself.  I look up to you so much in the way you mothered me.  And if I can only get HALF of what you did right in the lives of my two boys, I know that I am going to be damn good mother. 

Sometimes I think about what keeps this family of 7 together with all of our different dynamics, dissimilarities, and tainted pasts? But I now know the answer: it's you, our mother.  We all came from YOU; every single one of us felt apart of you, was nourished by you, was carried by you for 9 months (give or take) before we took our first breath into this world.  Essentially every single one of us took something from you—a different part of you—and that is the bond that keeps us together.  YOU are the BEST of all of us. Now raising two little boys I realize how selfless it is to be a mother. YOU raised SEVEN—I now know you gave us EVERYTHING you had, even when you didn't have anything else to give.  You always did the best you could, and you did more than you could!

I love you. I am eternally indebted to you. I will forever respect you, honor you, praise your name, and live in gratitude for your life because of all of these encompassing ways that have made you my MOTHER.

HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY! 

And I will now add,  Happy Mother's Day!!

I love this video clip displaying all of the teaching moments we have with our children. From the moment they are born, to the moment they take their first step, to the moments they experience life, to the moments they leave our home . . . we are fortunate (some times we feel unfortunate) to be a part of every one of those moments.  When the days are long and hard, when the joyful, fulling moments are fleeting, it is important to take a step back and remember that WE allowed them to take a step forward.  Isn't that what Motherhood is all about: sacrifice, giving, selflessness, unconditional love?  You know I never realized it until adulthood, but I am grateful my mother gave these things to me so that I  may have the life experiences I've had.  And in my moments of wanting to sacrifice less and be more selfish in my present roll as a mother, I recall all the moments that my mother was less selfish, more loving, more tolerant, patient kind, and my heart swells with so much appreciation—the kind of appreciation I want my boys to feel for me one day.  And so on the tired, lonely, hard, exhausting moments of motherhood, I will remember the little feet I gave birth too, the little feet that I helped assist in their first steps, and the big feet that will one day go out into this big world and leave his ever impacting mark upon it. 

My Grandmother

My Mother

Me as a mother to these two beautiful boys

Upon This Rock

Lesson 17  Upon This Rock

On display:  

Sealing pic 

Quotes on wall 

Christ pic 

Temple pic 

Scriptures 

Music playing-mikes speaker  

Becks BOM scriptures  

Church videos 
iPod with head phones  

Pass along card  

Have music playing, display items 

Have volunteer come to front: "you forgot to put on a few things when you got dressed today, here let me help you out." Paste words all over them (forehead, arm, etc): Love, serve, obey, honor, be moral, be kind, be grateful, smile, be loyal, Christ, be happy, sacrifice, pray, scriptures, temple, home teaching. 

Now that you are officially dressed for the day you can be on your way :). 

As they go to be seated have them carry a pass along card, clip on iPod and headphones playing church music. 

 Oh and don't forget to pick me up some flowers for Mother's Day :)  

 Observing these surroundings (the music, the pictures, the added attire), what's the likelihood of this person forgetting Christ and all of the commandments, and blessings God has given them?  

 QUOTE 1

President Ezra Taft Benson said that people who are “captained by Christ will be consumed in Christ. … Enter their homes, and the pictures on their walls, the books on their shelves, the music in the air, their words and acts reveal them as Christians” (in Conference Report, Oct. 1985, 6; or Ensign, Nov. 1985, 6–7). 

 Science reveals that only 1 thought can occupy our minds at one time, thus making the point that it's essential to focus on positive, uplifting things. As King Benjamin teaches us in 

Mosiah 4:30

"if [we] do not awatch [ourselves] and [our] bthoughts, and [our] cwords, and [our] deeds, and observe the commandments of God, and dcontinue in the faith of what [we] have heard concerning the coming of our Lord, even unto the end of [our] lives, [we] must perish. And now, O [men] remember, and perish not." 

 Moses gave similar counsel to the Israelites in regards to them prioritizing one action: to REMEMBER (and im stressing that it's a verb—an action—it's not something passive, we need to be actively remembering)  

 In our readings today Moses delivers his last speech to the Israelites. He admonishes them to remember all the blessings the Lords given them, and encourages them to keep the commandments so they can inherit ALL the blessings of The Lord. (This is right as they are about to enter the promised land) .  

 Let's read a few verses of this counsel Moses gives them 

 Deut 6:5 And thou shalt alove the Lord thy God with all thine bheart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy cmight.  

 *first commandment given: love God with all our heart 

Why is this the first commandment? 

If we have a love for God in our heart, it's easier to act out of that love and to want to keep all of the other commandments because we love the originator of those commandments 

 6 And these awords, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine bheart: 

 We need to carry this love in our heart—the most vital organ in our body  

 7 And thou shalt ateach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt btalk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. 

 8 And thou shalt abind them for a bsign upon thine hand, and they shall be as cfrontlets between thine eyes. 

 9 And thou shalt write them upon the aposts of thy house, and on thy gates. 

 So I wasn't too crazy in dressing our volunteer as such (this was the exact image that came into my mind when reading these verses). Essentially the Lord is saying "douse yourself in these covenants and reminders."  

 The children of Israel literally did this by wearing these frontlets, that were “strips of parchment on which were written four passages of scripture … and which were rolled up and attached to bands of leather worn … around the forehead or around the arm” serving as physical reminders of the covenants they had made with God [Bible Dictionary, “Frontlets,” 676])

 Obviously we are not going to walk around with post it notes attached to us but we can create a suitable environment in our home that can foster such Christ centered thoughts and feelings. Each day we walk outside our door we are bombarded with things of the world. It's important, as the scriptures remind us, to place that complete armor of gods protection upon us.  

 Time and time again in this speech Moses is giving he reiterates how vital it is to teach these commandments to our children.  

 What are some examples of how you have instilled these reminders—of God and the commandments—in your children?  

 The more I parent, the more I realize that kids learn less from what you say, and more from how you act. And so I've seen first hand that my 3year old son Beckahm has grown to be enthusiastic about the scriptures because I'm enthusiastic about them. 

He has such an affinity for the prophets in the OT; they are like his superheroes—because I've been animated about them and have made them out to be superheroes. I read the illustrative version of the scriptures to him and if possible let him watch an animated video replicating that story we've just read.  

9 out of 10 times after our reading he wants to pretend he's David and I'm Goliath while throwing paper stones at me, or build a boat to put all his stuffed animals on, or create a den that I cast him into with his stuffed lions :).  

 It's important that we are constantly feeding and nourishing our children with these reminders  

 Moses reminds the Israelites that they had to eat manna, they had to travel 40 years through the wilderness, they had to go through all of these hardships in order to be tested to see if they would be faithful to God, if they would worship him, follow him, and be worthy to inherit this great promised land he'd promised to Abrahams seed. 

Let's read a couple verses:  

 Deut 8:9 A land wherein thou shalt eat bread without scarceness, thou shalt not lack any thing in it; a land whose stones are iron, and out of whose hills thou mayest dig abrass.

 10 When thou hast eaten and art full, then thou shalt bless the Lord thy God for the good land which he hath given thee. 

 11 Beware that thou aforget not the Lord thy God, in not keeping his commandments, and his bjudgments, and his statutes, which I command thee this day: 

 12 Lest when thou hast eaten and art full, and hast built goodly houses, and dwelt therein; 

13 And when thy herds and thy flocks multiply, and thy silver and thy gold is multiplied, and all that thou hast is multiplied; 

 14 Then thine aheart be blifted up, and thou cforget the Lord thy God, which brought thee forth out of the land of Egypt, from the house of bondage; 

 15 Who led thee through that great and terrible wilderness, wherein were fiery aserpents, and scorpions, and bdrought, where there was no water; who brought thee forth cwater out of the rock of flint; 

 16 Who fed thee in the wilderness with amanna, which thy fathers knew not, that he might humble thee, and that he might bprove thee, to do thee good at thy latter end; 

 17 And thou say in thine heart, My power and the might of mine hand hath gotten me this wealth. 

 Moses is talking to them this way, setting the stage, because he knows what's going to happen: they'll become wealthy and prosperous and then what? The inevitable cycle of the BOM: PRIDE.  

 QUOTE 2 
President Brigham Young said: “The worst fear that I have about [members of this Church] is that they will get rich in this country, forget God and his people, wax fat, and kick themselves out of the Church and go to hell. This people will stand mobbing, robbing, poverty, and all manner of persecution, and be true. But my greater fear for them is that they cannot stand wealth; and yet they have to be tried with riches, for they will become the richest people on this earth” (in Preston Nibley, Brigham Young: The Man and His Work [1936], 128). 

 The Lord wants to bless us with wealth and abundance but there's stipulations attached to that wealth, what are they?  

 Acknowledge his hand in all things, keep the commandments, do good with our wealth as we read in  

 Jacob 2:18 But abefore ye seek for briches, seek ye for the ckingdom of God. 

 19 And after ye have obtained a hope in Christ ye shall obtain riches, if ye seek them; and ye will seek them for the intent to ado good—to clothe the naked, and to feed the hungry, and to liberate the captive, and administer relief to the sick and the afflicted. 

 Why is it so important to share our wealth? Where does our wealth originate? God  

 Deut 8:18 But thou shalt remember the Lord thy God: for it is he that giveth thee power to get awealth, that he may establish his covenant which he sware unto thy fathers, as it is this day. 

 For some reason we humans are only humbled in poverty and seek for Gods assurance when our life is in shambles, but the minute we are on the "up", we think we are the ones that got us there and we acknowledge God no more. We need to remember as we were taught by Moses at the first of the year, that "man is nothing"—without God—concept no matter our circumstance.  

 CHRIST IS OUR ROCK  

 Deut 32:3 Because I will apublish the name of the Lord: ascribe ye greatness unto our God.
 

4 He is the aRock, his work is bperfect: for all his ways are cjudgment: a God of truth and without iniquity, djust and right is he. 

 Who is "the Rock?" Why is Christ likened to a rock? 

He's unmovable, steady, unchangeable and changeable, solid, strong... 

 This rock we are speaking of is 2 fold—it's Jesus Christ himself, but it's also having a testimony of Jesus Christ  

 Elder Bruce R. McKonkie gave a talk entitled "Upon this Rock." In it he described how revelation is our rock.  

 "The things of God are known only by the power of his Spirit. God stands revealed or he remains forever unknown. No man can know that Jesus is the Lord but by the Holy Ghost.

Revelation: Pure, perfect, personal revelation—this is the rock! 

 Revelation that Jesus is the Christ: the plain, wondrous word that comes from God in heaven to man on earth, the word that affirms the divine Sonship of our Lord—this is the rock! 

 The divine sonship of our Lord: the sure, heaven-sent word that God is his Father and that he has brought life and immortality to light through the gospel—this is the rock! 

 The testimony of our Lord: the testimony of Jesus, which is the spirit of prophecy—this is the rock! 

 All this is the rock, and yet there is more. Christ is the Rock: the Rock of Ages, the Stone of Israel, the Sure Foundation—the Lord is our Rock!" 

 Why is it so important that we seek revelation, that we are built on this rock?  

 So that when we are hit with all these physical, emotional, spiritual ailments or trials, we remain unmovable, knowing that it is in God who we trust, who we worship, who we turn to. 

Two different scriptures provide us with a great visual of this concept 

 SCRIPTURE 1 

Helaman 5:12 And now, my sons, remember, remember that it is upon the arock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your bfoundation; that when the devil shall send forth his mighty winds, yea, his shafts in the whirlwind, yea, when all his hail and his mighty cstorm shall beat upon you, it shall have no power over you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if men build they cannot fall. 

SCRIPTURE 2 

Matthew 7:

24 ¶Therefore whosoever aheareth these sayings of mine, and bdoeth them, cI will liken him unto a dwise man, which ebuilt his house upon fa rock:

25 And the arain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and bbeat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was founded upon a crock.

26 And every one that heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them not, shall be likened unto a afoolish man, which built his house upon the sand:

27 And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that ahouse; and it bfell: and great was the fall of it. 

 Think about all of the temptations that exist in this world. Surely if our lives are not centered on Christ we will fall.  

 Elder Bruce R. Mckonkie
"Upon this Rock" 

"Every person born in this world builds a house of some sort and puts it on a foundation of his own choosing. And every house built in this mortal sphere is subject to the storms and strifes of life. Our mortal probation is one in which the divine purpose calls for rain and wind and floods. 

 We live in the midst of a swirling storm of sin. The rains of evil and the winds of false doctrine and the floods of carnality beat upon every house.

It is within our power to build a house of faith, a house of righteousness, a house of salvation. 

 We can, if we will, even build a house of God, a holy sanctuary, a temple of the living God. Indeed, every Latter-day Saint who is true and faithful has built for himself a “temple of God” in which “the Spirit of God dwelleth.” And as Paul says: “If any man defile the temple of God, him shall God destroy; for the temple of God is holy, which temple ye are.” (1 Cor. 3:16–17.) 

 If our house is built upon a rock with the brick and mortar of good works, it will withstand the storms and perils of life and preserve us for an eternal inheritance hereafter. If it is built upon the sands of evil with the rusty nails and rotting timber of carnal things, it will be destroyed when the rains and the winds and the floods beat upon it." 

 A covenant is a two way promise or agreement. Think of it like an employer, you wouldn't expect to get paid without working and so it is with the blessings given to us from The Lord. If we want those blessings, we need to live righteous of them, and always remember the deliverer of those blessings, so that we can have the promise God gives us in  

 D&C 6:34 Therefore, fear not, little aflock; do good; let earth and hell combine against you, for if ye are bbuilt upon my rock, they cannot prevail.

I love how this scripture reminds us how it is necessary that we be tempted and tried—that earth and hell will no doubt combine against us—but if we choose to be built upon His rock, and have faith in him while doing the best we can with the allotments we have been given, all of these combining elements will not prevail.